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WEEKLY WHINE

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GOOD TRY, QATAR

“Although Warner suffers from a well known case of nepotism, it will not affect his vote here.” Obtain a prescription for Nepotaid in Good Try, Qatar.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Prediction, Football, Men’s World Cup, Australia, England, Japan, Korea Rep, Netherlands, Belgium, Qatar, Russia, Spain, Portugal, United States

64 BETTER NAMES

“In a marathon session that ran almost fifteen minutes, of which six were wasted because participants were suggesting names faster than Gaby could type them, the GoobNet Special Projects Enhancement and Enforcement Division [SPEED] has identified 64 potential names for your football club.” See if Stenography Kansas City appears in 64 Better Names.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, MLS

SO THAT’S WHY MY MARGARITA IS SO CONFUSING

“Looks like the power is still on in this building. And talking of power, let’s see who our Powerade Chosen Ones for today are.” See who has the highest Castrol Index in So That’s Why My Margarita Is So Confusing.

Keywords: Variety, Sport, Misfortune Cookies, Football, Men’s World Cup

BLUES, ZINGS, AND OCTOPUSES

“You mean, we should have been looking away from it.” See what deserves your full and undivided lack of attention in Blues, Zings, and Octopuses.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup, Review committee

ABUNDANTLY TRUE

“As further punishment, we will then deploy the Prawn Sandwich Brigade to Afghanistan.” See the world’s most élite fighting unit by looking somewhere other than Abundantly True.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup, Prediction

BEST KITS EVAR!!!!!!

“This is a good idea, but the home stripe should be red, not least because it will allow supporters to cry, ‘The red stripe is beer! Yay beer!’” See why you should be excited to find coloured graphic elements in Best Kits Evar!!!!!!.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, Men’s World Cup, Sport uniforms

FOOTBALL IS COMING HOME AND GOING AWAY

“We are confident that any of these nations would be capable of organising an extremely successful Men’s World Cup.” Evaluate the relative merits of a variety of locations around the world, without taking into account what they will be paying the referees, in Football is Coming Home and Going Away.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup, Australia, England, Japan, Korea Rep, Netherlands, Belgium, Qatar, Russia, Spain, Portugal, United States

20,000, MY ASS

“So, if you live in a free nation, don’t forget to thank the longstanding corruption in Brazilian football for its place in keeping the world safe for democracy.” Celebrate Ricardo Teixeira in the same breath as Ronald Reagan and George W Bush in 20,000, My Ass.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: ISSA HAYATOU

“The confederation is not responsible for providing security until the team arrives in the city in which its matches are played.” See how culpable parties rationalise their decisions in Schmilblick Patrol: Issa Hayatou.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football

SCOTTISH KIT RELIEF

“The away uniform, of course, is a preposterous pink and black adventure that should not be allowed in the presence of children.” Establish the Parents Footballing Council in Scottish Kit Relief.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, Scotland, Sport uniforms

CLEAR TO EVERYONE WHO DESERVES A SECOND CHANCE

“And you don’t even want to know what we’re going to do to them if they fuck this one up too.” Cower in fear at the prospect of what actions we might take in Clear to Everyone Who Deserves a Second Chance.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, UEFA, Prediction

MY DRAW IS BETTER THAN YOUR DRAW

“Well, okay, it isn’t that easy.” Calibrate the difficulty level of your favourite activities in My Draw is Better Than Your Draw.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Football, Men’s World Cup, Interactive

INTERACTION: MEN’S WORLD CUP DRAW

“How should I know? Am I a psychic?” Make complete guesses about the future in Interaction: Men’s World Cup Draw.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Interaction, Football, Men’s World Cup

BLINDNESS

“Are you a Swedish football referee?” Don’t admit to your shortcomings in Blindness.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup, France, Ireland Rep

KICKS FOR CLICKS

“You sound like one of the people who paid only GB£5.” Get out your wallet and watch some Internet in Kicks for Clicks.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Mailbox, Football, Men’s World Cup, England, United States

CLEAR TO EVERYONE

“We here at GoobNet are pleased to present to you this prediction of the group and elimination phases of the 2009-10 UEFA Europa League [formerly the UEFA Cup].” See why Galatasaray are sure to be disappointed in Clear to Everyone.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, UEFA, Prediction

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