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FILLING YOUR NON-SEQUITUR NEEDS SINCE 1997

WEEKLY WHINE

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IMPROVING UPON WORST

“You deserve better, and we are going to give you better.” Discover just how far we have to climb in Improving Upon Worst.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT

EUROPEAN FOOTBALL: ARRRGH!

“That was probably a miscalculation on your part, but still, thanks.” Avoid making the same mistake that Jack Warner made in European Football: ARRRGH!.

Keywords: Sport, Propaganda, Support, ARRRGH, Football, UEFA

REDUCTION IN COMPLEXITY

“Back already? How was India?” Determine which of many head nods best applies to Reduction in Complexity.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT

PLUS MAILLOTS

“And it will be fun to see whether riders will attempt to avoid scoring points in order to remain in contention for this classification.” Get shut out in Plus Maillots.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Cycling, Tour de France

YOU’RE WELCOME FOR YOUR WELCOME

“Actually, it was much more complicated and nuanced than that.” Deny all suggestion of shades of grey in You’re Welcome for Your Welcome.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPLUT, Football, Men’s World Cup

AND DID THOSE TEETH

“You put it in their mouth.” Realise that we are not after all talking about Mr Pibb in And Did Those Teeth.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, Men’s World Cup

UNNECESSARILY DAMAGING

“We urge teams not to dress like goalkeepers, no matter how many jerseys they think they can sell.” Find out where Jorge Campos has gone in Unnecessarily Damaging.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, Men’s World Cup, Sport uniforms

DECISIONS ARE BEING MADE RAPIDLY

“Telling people what is happening in the world and giving them context in order to help them understand things and make informed decisions is so 20th century.” Find out that we are late to the party in Decisions Are Being Made Rapidly.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT

ADDING TO THE NETWORK

“Although there is such a thing as Bay Area Rapid Transit, it actually services an astonishingly small portion of the Bay Area.” See why Salinas never gets its due in Adding to the Network.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, High speed rail, HEARTANDSOUL

COME RIGHT IN, MAGIC

“Join us for a moment as we talk about sport.” Join us for a moment as we talk about sport, and then go away the next moment as we cease talking about sport, in Come Right In, Magic.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPLUT

THE BIAS OF REALITY

“But what if you want to know what is really happening in the region?” Resign yourself to finding out only what Vladimir Putin wants you to know in The Bias of Reality.

Keywords: Politics, Support, SPLUT

ADMINISTRATIVE NOTES FOR JAN 2014

Warning: Tournament may contain protests.” See why everyone hell no won’t go in Administrative Notes for JAN 2014.

Keywords: Support, Administrivia

QUESTIONS TO BE ADDRESSED

“At least, he would if you cared about people who are not you.” See what happens to people who make the dangerous mistake of not being you in Questions to Be Addressed.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT

BECAUSE HELMETBALL IS NOT NEARLY SILLY ENOUGH

“Note that it is theoretically possible that there will not be enough bowl games to go around.” Ensure that Nassau has a chance to participate in Because Helmetball Is Not Nearly Silly Enough.

Keywords: Sport, Support, American football

HOW TO RESET THE DOMESTIC CALENDAR

“We also provide eight midweek dates for domestic cup matches.” See when penalty shootouts are permitted to occur in How to Reset the Domestic Calendar.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, ITSAWFUL

DROPPING THE BALL

“But what of the results of the draw?” Determine which is the Group of Consequences in Dropping the Ball.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPLUT, Football, Men’s World Cup

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