|71||Men’s World Cup|
|21||Women’s World Cup|
MON 12 MAR 2018
“We are pleased to announce the seeds for the first GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship, determining the best female Paralympian of all time.” View the seeds for the first GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship in 2018 GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship: Seedings.
MON 05 MAR 2018
“So let’s prepare ourselves for it.” Wisely sidestep all numerical challenges in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Ten Chances.
MON 26 FEB 2018
“We hope these will help you through the next 3.96 years of being forgotten about again.” Do your best to retain the knowledge that curling is in fact a sport that exists, even in the face of constant Distraction.
MON 19 FEB 2018
“I do not think you are making the most advantageous use of the limited number of queries that we have.” Maximise enjoyment and efficiency as you standardise your consumption of Schmilblick Patrol: Ester Ledecká.
MON 12 FEB 2018
“Why do snowboards exist?” Realise that the answer is “because humans make them” in The Existence of the Winter Olympics.
MON 05 FEB 2018
“Well, that was an interesting Super Bowl.” Discover that we really do write these things months in advance and have no idea what actually happened yesterday in The Super Bowl Swingometer.
MON 29 JAN 2018
“How, then, do you maximise the number of guesses?” Just keep saying numbers in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Cover Up.
MON 22 JAN 2018
“You can hide in your fear bunker and only read news that coincides with your preprogrammed worldview, but that has repeatedly been proven to make the future arrive suddenly without notice when you least expect it.” Watch the fakest fake news that ever faked the news in The Future, and Why You Should Fear It.
MON 15 JAN 2018
“There was no official logo, but there was a poster depicting a giant eagle attacking some bobsledders, or something.” Watch out for snakes in Ice and Fire, but No Singing.
MON 08 JAN 2018
“From snowboarding to sliding, from curling to hockey, from alpine skiing to ski jumping to freestyle skiing to cross country skiing, this will be the world’s largest winter party.” Find out whether Olaf is invited to the Fastest Finger Fest: Winter Olympic Edition.
MON 01 JAN 2018
“We would say that Earth is saying that enough is enough, but really, this is a case of Earth saying that way, way, way too much is enough.” Put your foot down in Silence Broken.
MON 25 DEC 2017
“Is there anything sadder? Only drowning puppies. And there would have to be a lot of them.” Shut up and get to the point of the Top Lines of an Eternity with Nerds.
MON 18 DEC 2017
“Just say five and win the car.” Do not say R or buy a vowel in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Lucky Seven.
MON 11 DEC 2017
“I would also like to formally announce my endorsement of Wen’s description of my decision as a copout.” Stake your claim to “spineless wishy washy weaselling” in Stump Edvard Without Paying to Play.
MON 04 DEC 2017
“The event featured speeches by the presidents of FIFA and of Russia, who are top contenders for the Corruption Cup.” Apply a sufficient quantity of palm grease in Calling All Pundits.
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