GoobNet

GoobNet menu

GoobNet

THIS WEBSITE IS AN INTERNATIONAL SAFE HAVEN FOR LIES – NO MALTREATMENT OF LIES SHALL BE TOLERATED

WEEKLY WHINE

Interaction: The changing face of travel

Myers: Good evening, and welcome to this week's edition of Interaction, live once again in Warwickshire for an hour of discussions in four quadrants, or three if you've got something blocking one corner of your television screen. We've got a discussion about the tourism industry tonight. SARS is spreading in Asia. Faces are falling off mountains in North America. Things are exploding in much of the world. Is travel really all it's cracked up to be, or should we be hiding in our closets for a few years until we accumulate six months of vacation time? Here to answer that question and others is a panel. I'm Debbie Myers. Joining us in Concord, NH, USA is the director of Friends of the New Old Man of the Mountain, Ms Rebecca Navadu.

Navadu: Hi there!

Myers: In Jakarta, we have the executive treasurer of Indonesia's Board of External Commerce, Mr Kaubert Posey.

Posey: Nice to be here.

Myers: The vice president for configuration at the Shanghai Nights Travel Agency, Ms Alice Chu, joins us from Shanghai.

Chu: [voice muffled] Good evening.

Myers: And here with me in Warwickshire, the chair of the Department of Geomotion Studies at the State University of Milan, Mr Rafaelo Novo.

Novo: Good evening Debbie.

Myers: Thank you all for joining us today. Rebecca, I'd like to go to you first. Last weekend, the US state of New Hampshire lost its most recognisable symbol, the Old Man of the Mountain, when the rock formation that resembled a profiled face, unstable for decades, finally gave way to gravity. What effect will this have on tourism to New Hampshire?

Navadu: In the near term, Debbie, it will actually drive up tourism. We expect a lot of people who have grown up near New Hampshire or who have visited it before to come here and pay their respects, as it were, to the Old Man of the Mountain. But we're already thinking about what to do after that. An Old Man II would be a fitting project.

Myers: That's certainly a concern. Kaubert, what is the tourism situation in Indonesia?

Posey: Well, as I'm sure you'll recall, Indonesia was rocked by a bombing at a Bali resort last year, and tourism has not been the same since. In fact, with the carryover effect of SARS scaring people away from all of Asia, I think it's fair to say that tourism is now completely different.

Myers: Noble sentiments there. Alice, is the Shanghai balance of travel looking favourable now?

Chu: [voice still muffled] Definitely not. People are running away from Shanghai. Those who arrived in the city from rural areas are escaping and going back to their family's farms. They just aren't tough enough.

Myers: Well, that is certainly going to be a consideration. Rafaelo, how does the current climate of global uncertainty compare with years past?

Novo: We haven't seen anything like this since 1992. Before that, it was 1974. Before that, 1970. Before that, 1967. Before that, 1962. Before that, 1957. Before that, 1953. Before that, 1945.

Myers: I think that's something we'll have to confront. Alice, is Shanghai's reaction to the threat of SARS similar to other events, or are we witnessing new behaviour?

Chu: This is definitely new behaviour. Shanghai residents have historically been strong willed, committed, and reasonable. But now they're all paranoid just because there's an invisible killer in the air and on the rails and everything and nobody knows how it spreads.

Myers: Kaubert, what historical parallels can you draw to the situation in Indonesia?

Posey: There aren't really any parallels that can be drawn. In fact, with the boom period of the late 1980s, I think it's fair to say that perpendiculars can be drawn.

Myers: Rebecca, where has New Hampshire run into problems like this in the past?

Navadu: New Hampshire has never run into problems like this before, because all other tourist attractions have been built to the most exacting standards. Like Albo the Giant Robotic Bison outside of Cudgeworth.

Myers: With that, then, we'll be moving on into questions. The usual choice of communication methods is available today: E-mail, telephone, physical mail, facsimile, telegraph, CB radio, and spelling it out in sauce when we order our pizzas. Our first question comes to us from Piedmont, NC, USA. Are you there, Al?

Al in Piedmont: Hi.

Myers: Hello Al. What is your question?

Al in Piedmont: How much do you think the car that North Carolina governor Mike Easley wrecked yesterday would get on E-Bay?

Myers: [pause] What?

Al in Piedmont: Shall I repeat the question?

Myers: Please don't.

Al in Piedmont: Aaaaaaaaaaaaa... [voice recedes into faintness]

Myers: Remember, we only want questions about tourism. All other questions will instantly bring about the portable trap door. Now, here's a question by E-mail from John in Limerick, Ireland, who asks whether tourists will be frightened away from North Carolina because of the crash involving the governor of that US state. That's more like it. Rafaelo, will tourists be frightened away?

Novo: The important thing to remember is that this has happened before. It happened in 2001. And in 1997. And in 1993. And in 1985. And in 1977. And in 1975. And in 1960. And in 1883.

Myers: Well, perhaps we can take this moment to discuss the more general problem of sporting events relating tourism. Alice, I'd like to discuss the 2003 Women's World Cup of football if I may. It was to be played in China but was changed a week ago. This decision was made due to SARS; how has that affected travel in turn?

Chu: I just don't see why people are so whiney. It's like, ooh there's a new virus that could potentially spread throughout entire stadiums filled with spectators, let's keep them from going. It's highly irrational.

Myers: Nonetheless, isn't it much to do with the failure of Chinese health authorities to properly deal with the outbreak of SARS? If cases had been properly isolated from the outset, and if the WHO had been called in earlier, wouldn't China be in a much improved position that would perhaps allow football tournaments and conventions to go ahead as normal?

Chu: That's ridiculous. HIV started appearing [coughs] in the United States, and more than twenty years later, it's seemingly unstoppable.

Myers: Kaubert, does this situation bear similarities to that in Indonesia? If the war on terrorism was going better, would that not leave Indonesia in better shape than it is?

Posey: It's possible, though not probable. Security problems are not peculiar to Indonesia. Any place you have large groups of Americans is a potential terrorist target: military bases, resorts, the United States. In fact, in Indonesia, I think it's fair to say that it's not only not probable, it's improbable.

Myers: Well, with that, it's time to move on to our next question. A facsimile from Jenna in Cavalier, NH, USA asks about the memorial event held for the Old Man of the Mountain today. Rebecca, what was the turnout?

Navadu: It was quite motivating. There were about 500 people there, and everyone who contributed did so. It was quite good.

Myers: Your group, Friends of the New Old Man of the Mountain, is trying to reconstruct the Old Man. But there seems to be some opposition, correct?

Navadu: I guess. But I was eventually able to get them to stop throwing stones at me, so I think in a few decades they'll see my side of the story.

Myers: And what is your side of the story?

Navadu: The outside.

Myers: The outside?

Navadu: Yes. Everyone else's side is the inside. But I get the outside.

Myers: [pause] Rafaelo, what about the desire to reconstruct damaged or destroyed landmarks? How often does that happen?

Novo: We've seen this sort of thing in 2002. And in 2001. And in 2000. And in 1999. And in 1998. And in 1997. And in 1996. And in 1995. And in 1994. And in 1994 again. And in 1993. And in 1992. And in 1991. And in 1990. And in 1989. And in 1988. And -

Myers: Let's take one more question. Consternation in Kampala, Uganda, are you there?

[silence]

Myers: Consternation in Kampala? Are you there?

[silence]

Myers: Well, we seem to have lost Consternation, but in the meantime I can tell you what she wanted to ask. It was to -

Consternation in Kampala: What?

Myers: Hello? Consternation in Kampala?

[silence]

Myers: Okay, I guess we did briefly succeed in reestablishing contact. Her question was -

Consternation in Kampala: Hello?

Myers: Hello? Consternation in Kampala?

Consternation in Kampala: No, I'm her twin sister, Confusion.

Myers: I see. Well, will you be able to give us the question?

Confusion in Kampala: Yes.

Myers: All right then. What is the question?

Confusion in Kampala: For a price.

Myers: I beg your pardon?

Confusion in Kampala: I'll tell you the question for a million British pounds.

Myers: Well, we already have the question. You can't really blackmail us.

Confusion in Kampala: No, you have a question that Consternation claimed was hers. I'm the only person in the world who has our real question.

Myers: If the question is from both of you, isn't it hers as well?

Confusion in Kampala: [pause] I'm the only person in the world who has our real question in writing.

Myers: Right, I don't want to talk to you any more.

Confusion in Kampala: What? Why not?

Myers: You're too silly.

Confusion in Kampala: But we want to be on the television!

Myers: No.

Confusion in Kampala: Aaaaaaaaaaaaa... [voice recedes into faintness]

Myers: Remember, we only want questions about tourism. An E-mail from Kristina in Tromsø, Norway asks where the Women's World Cup will be played if not China. Kaubert, I understand you're also involved with women's football in Indonesia. What is the latest on the Women's World Cup?

Posey: There's certainly no shortage of interested hosts. The US, Australia, Brazil, and Sweden have all declared their interest. In fact, in terms of places, I think it's fair to say that there are not only several choices, there are a number of choices.

Myers: Right. Well, Alice, China are at least guaranteed the 2007 Women's World Cup. Assuming Shanghai hosts the final for that tournament as it would have done this year, will the prospects for tourism in China recover?

Chu: Of course. Those of us who are still here have had to take a few precautions, like this [coughs] Plexiglas box I've sealed myself in, [zoom out to reveal Plexiglas box] but on the whole ... everyone I know ... [slumps forward and falls asleep]

Myers: And I think it's time now to thank Mr Rafaelo Novo, Ms Alice Chu, Mr Kaubert Posey, and Ms Rebecca Navadu for lending the closest they had to insight today. Next week we'll be talking about the growing problem of E-mail spam, and our guests will be a network administrator in Taiwan, an Internet sales director in Canada, a data analyst in the United States, and a pro-spam campaigner in Belgium. Until then, good night.

Guy in Shanghai: [carrying Chu out of Plexiglas box] I think she'll be fine.

Myers: Did she forget to make some air holes in that box, or what?

PLEASE SEND ALL PUTRID FILTH TO <GOOBNET‍@‍GOOBNET.NET>

© 2023 GOOBNET ENTERPRISES, INC [WHICH DOESN’T ACTUALLY EXIST HOWEVER]

THIS FILE ACCURATE AS OF: WED 04 JAN 2023 – 21:43:06 UTC · GENERATED IN 0.006 SECONDS