GoobNet
GoobNet
GoobNet Football
WE HAVE SUCCESSFULLY SENT HUMOUR FORWARD THROUGH TIME! SEE OUR JOKE IN 2188

WEEKLY WHINE

... 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018

HOW TO PLAY MORE WOMEN’S FOOTBALL

“We expand the women’s Olympic football tournament to sixteen teams.” Discover that Jamaica are not going anywhere without a fight in How to Play More Women’s Football.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football

HOW TO QUALIFY FOR THE WOMEN’S WORLD CUP

“The AFC has an alarmingly low Women’s World Cup participation rate: less than half of its membership entered the 2019 qualifiers.” Remind Saudi Arabia early and often that women are footballers too in How to Qualify for the Women’s World Cup.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, Women’s World Cup

LAGRANGIAN POINTS OF INTEREST

”Several thousand asteroids in the Greek camp are known so far.” Mount an expensive and risky mission to swap 617 Patroclus with 624 Hektor in Lagrangian Points of Interest.

Keywords: Variety, Space

THERE IS NO NEED TO PANIC ON THE SUBWAY

“Interchange to the Govan bus station.” Get off the bus in order that you may get on the train, but keep in mind that There Is No Need to Panic on the Subway.

Keywords: Variety, Transit

IS IT SOCIALIST OR NOT?

“A number of US laws, such as the Clean Air Act, the Clean Water Act, the Safe Drinking Water Act, and the Toxic Substances Control Act, are administered by the Environmental Protection Agency.” Know where to breathe in Is It Socialist or Not?.

Keywords: Politics, Knowledge

SPANISH PRIMERA DIVISIÓN: WHATEVER HAPPENED TO...

“In fact, Barcelona’s first league match had to be delayed so that they could play the winner of the final.” Wait for anyone... anyone... to win in Spanish Primera División: Whatever Happened To....

Keywords: Sport, Knowledge, Football, Spain

WAS YOUR STACK CHALLENGED?

“The GoobNet Clear the Stack Audio Challenge is coming soon.” Clear your ears and prepare for another round in Was Your Stack Challenged?.

Keywords: Mathematics, Community, Mailbox

THE GOOBNET CLEAR THE STACK CHALLENGE

“The challenge continues until the stack overflows.” Watch for falling hexagons as you take The GoobNet Clear the Stack Challenge.

Keywords: Mathematics, Community, Interactive

TOP LINES HEARD ON A CELL PHONE TELEPHONE

“Everyone out of the Universe!” All personnel must evacuate the Universe and report to the Mandatorium for the Top Lines Heard on a Cell Phone Telephone.

Keywords: Variety, Futurama

COMPUTE THE PROBABILITY OF STUMPING EDVARD

“Have you ever met a human who eats strange things?” Put down your quinoa and kale bar, pick up your calculator, and Compute the Probability of Stumping Edvard.

Keywords: Mathematics, Community, Edvard, Stump Edvard, Probability

FULLY CONFIDENT IN CONFIDENCE

“Five conferences were selected for our team of prognosticators to prognosticate.” See what prognostications our prognosticators have prognosticated in Fully Confident in Confidence.

Keywords: Variety, Sport, American football, Prediction

ETHICAL STANDARDS OPTIONAL

“They wanted to know how groundbreaking this was, and they wanted to know what other fruits would capture the audience’s attention even more.” Realise that you really wanted to know all about passionfruits in Ethical Standards Optional.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT, Mathematics, Space, Science

TOP LINES AS RATED BY THE COOLOMETER

“I deserve this.” Gain familiarity with the type of thing you can see in the Top Lines As Rated By the Coolometer.

Keywords: Variety, Futurama

GET ON THE BUS, OR THE TRAIN, OR THE MONORAIL

“It would be expected to open concurrently with the automated train, currently planned for 2023 – which can’t come soon enough.” Depart for your departure in Get On the Bus, Or the Train, Or the Monorail.

Keywords: Variety, Transit

THE WRONGEST PENALTY IN THE HISTORY OF WRONGNESS

“In a tournament that set a record with twelve own goals, one of them in the final, how can we decide who receives the coveted Jeff Agoos ¡Autogolazo! Award?” Take to the streets in outrage that your favoured candidate did not receive the Golden Blindfold in The Wrongest Penalty in the History of Wrongness.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup, Review committee

A BRIEF LOOK AHEAD

“The fact that this squad have not yet been brought down to Earth in horribly crushing fashion does not mean that it will not happen.” Watch the semifinals from your panic bunker in A Brief Look Ahead.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Men’s World Cup

PLEASE SEND ALL PUTRID FILTH TO <GOOBNET‍@‍GOOBNET.NET>

© 2018 GOOBNET ENTERPRISES, INC [WHICH DOESN’T ACTUALLY EXIST HOWEVER]

THIS FILE ACCURATE AS OF: MON 22 OCT 2018 – 12:00:00 UTC · GENERATED IN 0.047 SECONDS

all times in Coordinated Universal Time