WEEKLY WHINE

Interaction: It's an ad, ad, ad, ad, ad world

Myers: Good evening, and welcome back to Warwickshire for this week's iteration of Interaction, the programme in which you get a chance to explore the interiors of newsmakers' heads. But don't worry about getting lost - I'll hold the door open for you. I'm Debbie Myers. This week we're looking at corporate sponsorship, which pervades everything. We'll take particular note of a strange case in India that has been going on for about a month, wherein several companies painted their logos on rock faces in a fragile ecosystem at the foot of the Himalayas. Are companies running out of places to advertise? Are people running out of places to avoid adverts? Is, perhaps, advertising essential to an smoothly running society? I think that's stupid too, but let's see what our panel has to say about that. Joining us this week is, first, the stenographer at the Supreme Court of India, Mr Bharwung Nirgal, joining us in New Delhi.

Nirgal: Good evening.

Myers: In New York City, we have Mr Tucker Hradesh, a project manager at Happi and McMirth Advertising.

Hradesh: Hi there.

Myers: In Calcutta, we have Ms Suhdesh Varika, advertising specialist at Sleeping Bags of Calcutta.

Varika: Hello Debbie.

Myers: And here with me in Warwickshire is Ka-Ching TV Europe's technology analyst, Ms Vørska Höllerer.

Höllerer: Nice to be here.

Myers: And in Manali, India, we have our correspondent Stangha Suronvorlar with the latest. Hello Stangha.

Suronvorlar: Good evening Debbie. I'm now in the Manali-Rohtang pass outside the city of Manali. The highway that runs through here is flanked with craggy mountain slopes and moss-covered rocks. But recently these rocks were defaced with the symbols of major companies, some based in India, others large international corporations. In fact, here behind me [points], you can see a yellow rock there. That is apparently one of the former Coca-Cola adverts that has now been painted over. That was the interesting twist that came about a week into the Supreme Court's examination of the case. Needless to say, the court was displeased with these actions, which have now damaged this fragile ecosystem further. Debbie?

Myers: Thank you Stangha. We'll get more from you a bit later. Bharwung, this week twelve companies were fined by the Supreme Court of India for placing the adverts. Can you give us a quick summary of the case?

Nirgal: The case was a long drawn out affair, with a number of unusual twists. The twelve companies included the Coca-Cola Company, PepsiCo, and a number of local firms. The court took notice in August and submitted requests for information from the two soda manufacturers. The affected area is in the Himachal Pradesh region, and it is one of the most important areas as far as ecosystems. I remember travelling up to that area once at the age of nine, and I saw the most unusual moss on the rocks. It was absolutely fascinating that something so funny looking could cling to life way up there, and I've always thought about that when I'm working on cases. It had the most delicate little green bits on the fronds, and there were black bits underneath that you could see when the wind picked up, -

Myers: A thrilling story. Tucker, could you tell us your impression of the level of advertising in society?

Hradesh: It's about right, I think. You don't want to be in bed with a girl, take off her shirt, and see the Gap's name on her stomach. But most else, I think, is fair game, and companies are doing a good job of identifying where adverts are inappropriate.

Myers: Some interesting thoughts there. Suhdesh, as another advertiser in India, what is your reaction to this Himalayan rock case?

Varika: It's pretty silly. You don't need to advertise on rocks when you can just deploy an inflatable advertisement.

Myers: A new angle there. Vørska, what do you think about advertising in technology?

Höllerer: What's with all these Java and Flash adverts? Do I really need to have a banner with spinning words and exploding pictures when I'm reading an article? There's no reason for that.

Myers: Well, that brings us to an important point. Web adverts seem to be much more prevalent than their counterparts in the physical world. Suhdesh, how do you think this problem can be solved?

Varika: There's no reason to advertise on the Internet, unless you've come up with an advertisement that people will actually want to click on. And I don't think there is such a thing.

Hradesh: Well, I disagree with that. If you can make it clear that it's in people's best interest to click an ad, it will work. Like if you offer a way to consolidate bills or come up with a good banner joke.

Myers: Bharwung, do you see a reasonable way to eliminate Internet advertisements?

Nirgal: Well, I've always thought that banner adverts are an unusual way to instigate epileptic seizures. A couple of years ago, my brother started using the computer with his sunglasses on, because he said the banners were too bright. And I thought that was weird because that's not really the problem. The adverts aren't really bright, but they flash and do stupid things. Some of them even make noises and get in your way so that you can't read the article. Once I was reading an article about a new line of bowling balls that had differently shaped holes, and there was an ad that said something about bowling shoes that don't slip. So the article looked something like "The BowlMeister 4000 tired of shoes has received much attention for that won't hold its new hole shape, which the manufacturers, on the floor -"

Myers: Undoubtedly. Remember, we want to find out what you at home have to say about advertising, and you have numerous ways to contact us. There's E-mail, telephone, telegraph, facsimile, post, and writing your question on the underside of a frisbee. We've received several questions by that method, but they were all boring. Before we go to the non-boring questions, though, let's check in once again with Stangha Suronvorlar in the Manali-Rohtang pass. Stangha?

Suronvorlar: Thanks Debbie. Both Coca-Cola and PepsiCo said that local franchisers and bottlers are responsible for marketing and distribution in this area. However, it was the manufacturers, not the franchisers, who were fined by the court. Both Coca-Cola and PepsiCo were fined 200,000 rupees, or about 4,000 euros, whereas the other ten companies whose adverts have appeared up here have each been fined half that amount. Evidently a measure of discrimination here.

Myers: Stangha, what exactly were these companies charged with?

Suronvorlar: Well, they were charged with environmental damage mainly, but the other charge was of using government property for commercial purposes. This area belongs to the Indian government, and strict environmental controls are in place here. Nonetheless, it has seen its share of damage. Aside from the painted rocks, this is a popular tourist destination, especially at this time of year. Consequently litter has become a serious problem in this pass, which for centuries has been part of trading routes that have linked India with China and with Central Asia.

Myers: Thank you Stangha. It's time to go to questions now, and our first is in a facsimile from Nadija in Bucharest, who asks whether advertising on rocks is common in India. Suhdesh, how much geologic advertising is done?

Varika: Not much, which is good news. It makes more sense to put up signs, which can be easily raised and lowered. They also provide shady homes for voles and other small animals, so they are in fact beneficial to the environment.

Myers: But isn't there such a thing as saturation of advertising? After all, when you go up into the Himalayas on a holiday, how much time are you really going to be spending deliberating which soft drink to purchase? Can't it be said that one shouldn't advertise at all in a natural environment such as that, where any commercial message is going to be distracting at best and irritating at worst?

Varika: I suppose so, but I don't think such arguments apply in this case. Any major tourist destination is going to be a good place for advertisers to set up, where they can contact a large number of people easily.

Hradesh: Yes, that's what our market research has consistently shown. Consumers are most receptive to non-intrusive advertising, but not when they actually go looking for it. When people watch the Super Bowl, for instance. Here in the US the Super Bowl has recently become the best place for advertisers to show their most creative productions. But Super Bowl advertisements are much less effective than you would expect, given the number of viewers. That's mainly because people are consciously waiting for the ads.

Myers: In fact, we have a question now about advertising in sports. David in Greenville, South Carolina, are you there?

David in Greenville: Yes, hi.

Myers: Hello David. What is your question?

David in Greenville: As an American, I'm very familiar with overadvertising, especially during football games on television. Are things that bad elsewhere?

Myers: You mean, are there so many advertisements during sporting events in other nations?

David in Greenville: Yeah. Like here, they show us two or three minutes of commercials after a punt. What about other places?

Myers: Vørska?

Höllerer: We here in Europe are pretty lucky, because we like soccer, and there's no time to show commercials during soccer matches. But now they've got all the title sponsorships. What's with that? Like here in England, you can turn on the "FA Barclaycard Premiership" and see Manchester United, whose uniforms read "Vodafone" and have a little Nike logo next to that, play Arsenal, whose uniforms read "O₂" and have a little Nike logo next to that. Or you can watch matches in the "FA Cup Presented by AXA", or the "Worthington Cup". And when you see the adverts during halftime, it's always "Amstel is a proud sponsor of the UEFA Champions League" or some such nonsense.

Myers: So the bottom line is that whilst there are fewer adverts during the match, they've found a way to continue advertising even after the match is over. Tucker, does this type of advertising actually work?

Hradesh: No, we've found it hasn't worked. Barclays Bank has not seen any significant rise in business since it became the title sponsor of the Premier League two years ago. After all, when you're having a drink at the pub, you don't want to see "Standard Urinals" at the bottom of your glass.

Myers: We have another question now from Omsk. Janina, are you there?

Janina in Omsk: Hello?

Myers: Hello Janina. What is your question?

Janina in Omsk: I want to ask about something that guy said. He said what types of advertisements don't work, but advertisers just keep doing them. Why's that?

Myers: Vørska, you've been studying Internet banner advertising, which has steadily become less effective over the past several years. Why are companies still clinging to an outdated business mode?

Höllerer: They're just out of touch with reality. What's with their attitude? "Banner ads aren't working! How can we fix this? I know, we'll make them bigger and put them in the middle of the page instead of the sides!" Don't they have any self control?

Myers: Suhdesh, has your company tried online advertising at all?

Varika: Not on my watch. That is a terrific way to alienate the public. Have you seen CNN's site lately? That's not only overadvertising, that's narcissistic overadvertising! There's no need for that.

Hradesh: Actually, I think that's sound business practise. It's certainly better than the alternative. After all, you wouldn't want to go to bed with a girl, pull down her shorts, and see "For a good time call Marlene" down there, would you?

Myers: [hesitantly] I guess not. Bharwung, now that the Supreme Court of India has cracked down on mountainous advertisements, are there any plans to do the same with Web banner adverts?

Nirgal: Well, I was talking with my ant the other day, and he said -

Myers: You were talking with whom?

Nirgal: My ant, Marcus.

Myers: You have an aunt named Marcus?

Nirgal: No, my ant. You know, Formicidae. He's got two legs missing and a false feeler, but he's fly. He lost the legs in a farming accident when he was working the rototiller. The crops were good that year, so he got through the worst of it. He's always been an industrious little ant, and the two legs missing have only slowed him down a little bit. I got him from one of my friends, Michael Ellis. He said that Marcus had been knighted by the queen when he retired from his hill. They gave him a full ceremony with all the-

Myers: Um-

Nirgal: -honour guard, overtures, drunkenness, and all that. Marcus was very touched by that, and-

Myers: Bhar-

Nirgal: -he wears the gold watch they gave him all the time. It was quite an event really, and he certainly earned it. I understand they want him to give motivational speeches to the hill now, but I'm not sure how much interest- [sound cuts off abruptly]

Myers: So once again we're forced to use the red button. Whilst there's still a chance, let me thank Ms Vørska Höllerer, Ms Suhdesh Varika, Mr Tucker Hradesh, and Mr Bharwung Nirgal for being here this evening, as well as our correspondent Stangha Suronvorlar. In a week's time we'll be back again to talk about a recent spate of pitch invasions in sport, with our guests including a Birmingham police captain, a representative from baseball's Chicago White Sox, a sport security expert, and a lawn bowler. Until then, good night.

Hradesh: I knew a lawn bowler once. I went to bed with her, took off her shirt, and saw "Fresh Cantaloupes" across her chest.

Höllerer: That was me, you bastard!