WEEKLY WHINE

Just brush Kate away

The news this week about an edited photograph of Kate Winslet appearing in the British edition of GQ magazine has sparked a firestorm of stormy fire around the world. Many people who live on Earth had strong opinions on this topic, and of these, some even wrote in to GoobNet - which just shows you how desperate they were. But in our continuing quest for notoriety, we felt compelled to don our protective gear and enter the GoobNet Mailbox. Here's our favourite of that flak.

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What the hell were those idiots at GQ thinking? Do they think they can airbrush whoever the hell they want? Who the hell do they think they are? Why the hell would they do that? Where the hell do they go grocery shopping? - Samantha Flanders, Napoli, Italy

They were thinking "How come we're never assigned to airbrush the nude pictures?". Yes. They think they're photographers. Because that's what they're paid to do. I don't know.

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Okay, those pictures were airbrushed, but by how much? - Laura Lessing, Urbana, IL, USA

According to the magazine's editor, Dylan Jones, "these pictures are not a million miles away from what she really looks like". Although that's only because the cord on their airbrush won't stretch that far.

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Didn't Kate Winslet lose a lot of weight a couple of years ago on some "facial feature diet"? - Todd Velton, Perth, WA, Australia

Yes. There is apparently some sort of diet wherein one's face and skin complexion are carefully scrutinised, and consumption guided according to some particular facial detail.

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Isn't that really weird? - Renega McIsotope, Volgograd, Russia

Yes.

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How the hell does that work, anyway? - Renega McIsotope, Volgograd, Russia

It doesn't.

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Well then, how the hell did Winslet lose all that weight? - Renega McIsotope, Volgograd, Russia

It's amazing what they do with airbrushes these days.

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I'm shocked and appalled by this revelation. Cancel my subscription immediately. - Paul Baul, Llcllvnrllcll, Wales, UK

Ooh, news flash. Cover girl airbrushed. Details at twenty three. A story of this magnitude hasn't broken since last Thursday.

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I'm shocked and appalled by your summary dismissal of the previous author's interesting and valid comments. Cancel my subscription immediately. - Lambda O'Micron, Regina, SK, Canada

Shut up.