WEEKLY WHINE

Advance notification

We here at GoobNet would like to notify the following actors of the roles by which we, the viewing public, will always know you.

We would like to apologise for this, because most of you are exceptional actors who have turned in wonderful performances in a variety of different films and television programmes.

For example, Wayne Knight, your roles in Jurassic Park, 3rd Rock from the Sun, and Torchwood, whilst themselves memorable, do not change the fact that when we see you, we will always feel the urge to squint at you and scowl, “Hello, Newman!”.

• Wayne Knight = Newman
• Gary Cole = Bill Lumbergh
• Michael Cera = George Michael Bluth
• Mark Hamill = Luke Skywalker
• Steve Buscemi = Mr Pink
• Samuel L Jackson = Jules Winfield
• James Corden = Craig Owens
• Anyone who has played the Doctor = Their respective Doctors
• Audrey Tautou = Amélie Poulain
• Laurence Fishburne = Morpheus
• Alan Ruck = Cameron Frye
• Tina Fey = Sarah Palin
• Kelsey Grammer = Sideshow Bob
• Stephen Colbert = “Stephen Colbert”
• Donald Trump = This creep
• John Oliver = This idiot asshole