Behind the stump

J-One: Even now, I hear people say, "Oh, they must make up those questions!"

Edvard: We don't make up those questions. That's simply not true. If you look at some of those questions, they can't possibly be made up. Look at last week. Mick Puck of Heisingbinger, Germany said, "Haven't you gotten my virus yet? No, wait! Oh, what a giveaway!" Who could possibly make that up?

J-One: But you have to admit, some of those questions are pretty bizarre.

Edvard: Yes.

J-One: So is your inbox really full of insane questions like that?

Edvard: That and spam. No, actually, the insane questions are not quite as common as the normal questions. And we do address many of the normal questions too. But some of the insane questions are good for a laugh, and that's why we include them.

A-Two: So are you just going for a cheap laugh, then?

Edvard: It's not a cheap laugh. Except for the "Because they're dumb" joke at the end of every Stump column. That's a cheap laugh. But really, no, we're not just going for cheap laughs. We want to try to improve people's understanding of the world, and if we can do it with some jokes mixed in as well, all the better. That's what GoobNet is all about, and that's why I've been working with these guys for so long.

A-Two: You've been part of the GoobNet team for more than four years now. How do you like them?

Edvard: They're great. Deb, especially, is a lot of fun. I send her links for porthole a lot. She doesn't use mine a lot, though. Reg is a good boss. He's easy to work for. Some of my old bosses back at the museum have been hard to work for, but Reg isn't like that at all. He's very hands off. He thinks that if he gets too involved in what we do, it won't be as good. And I like Debbie too. She's usually pretty quiet, but sometimes in a staff meeting she'll just suddenly make some sort of dry remark and crack us up. Like a couple of weeks ago, Deb was asking for a new laptop. She was trying to explain how old it was, and suddenly Debbie points to it and goes, "Look right there. It's got Tablet Up and Tablet Down keys."

J-One: What about Nathan?

Edvard: He just needs to shave more often.

A-Two: Getting back to Stump Edvard, how do you decide the topic? Do you ask for questions about a particular topic, or do you just wait to see what questions come in?

Edvard: We usually ask for questions about a topic, but on occasion we get so many about one thing, like the Eastern Seaboard blackout a couple of years ago, that we can do a column about it without having to specifically request it.

A-Two: You mentioned earlier the insane questions versus the normal questions. Do you try to mix up the normal questions and the insane questions?

Edvard: I like how we've adopted the term "insane questions".

J-One: It seems to fit.

Edvard: Yeah, it sure does. Anyway, we usually start with a few normal questions and move to more and more insane questions as the column goes on. The exact mix can vary, but I don't think we've ever had more than half insane questions.

J-One: Okay, so once you've chosen what questions you're going to answer, how do you actually answer them? Do you do a lot of research?

Edvard: I take whatever steps necessary to answer the question.

J-One: But what does that entail?

Edvard: Well, in the case of the normal questions, I do a couple of quick Web searches. I look for news articles or perhaps encyclopedia entries that might address the question. I get my information from sources like that. The insane questions, generally I don't need so much academic rigor to address those.

J-One: Academic rigor was probably the last thing on the person's mind.

Edvard: Yeah, probably.

A-Two: Now, more recently, you've had more to do. You've got your game show.

Edvard: Yes, I'm hosting Adventures of the Schmilblick Patrol every week.

A-Two: Is that taking away from your time to work on Stump Edvard columns?

Edvard: No, it isn't. Remember, I only do Stump columns three times a year. In between I'm splitting my time between the Utrecht Organism Centre and Schmilblick Patrol.

J-One: How does that work out for you? Travelling back and forth between continents, I mean.

Edvard: It's actually loads of fun. Between the guests at the museum and the guests on the show, I get to meet plenty of interesting people. Unlike most game shows, we can't tape a bunch of shows all at once. We have to do one every week to make sure that it's timely and that we have guests who are making news. So I work four days at the museum, come back to the US, and do a Schmilblick show.

A-Two: Can you spell "Schmilblick"?

Edvard: S-C-H-M-I-L-B-L-I-C-K.

A-Two: Good job.

J-One: Is that right?

A-Two: The fuck would I know? Anyway, there was one more thing I wanted to cover real quick. Do you have any advice for young aspiring website writers who might be reading this?

Edvard: Just find something you enjoy doing. Like, I enjoyed dynamite eating, and it led to this. That's about all you can do, really.