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I’M BRITNEY SPEARS’S SON, AND GOOBNET IS MUCH SAFER THAN MY MOMMY’S CAR

WEEKLY WHINE

... 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019

CHAMPIONS ALWAYS

“On Wednesday night, when the first leg of the final was to have been played in Medellín, candlelight vigils were instead held in Chapecoense’s stadium and in the home stadium of their final opponents, Atlético Nacional.” Go forward in all your beliefs, including the one that they are Champions Always.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Football, Brazil, Obituary

AN EAGERLY ANTICIPATED ARRIVAL

“The Parking Point Designator or PPD angle, which the PM pilot gives her from the PGNS, tells her where to look along the horizontal scale to find the place where the computer thinks they are going to park.” Indicate to the computer that there’s no way you are going to fit between those two SUVs as you make An Eagerly Anticipated Arrival.

Keywords: Variety, Space, Obituary

EIGHT WHO COULD POTENTIALLY BE MISSED

“As you are well aware, deaths of famous people are never funny.” Pay your last lack of respect to some important people in Eight Who Could Potentially Be Missed.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT, Obituary

TRAVEL BY TOILET!

“You can thank us for ending America’s addiction to oil, for putting a stop to the violence in Nigeria, for instantaneously making Hugo Chávez irrelevant, and for reversing all of the hard work put in to bring job opportunities to the Iraqi people.” Join us in renovating the world order in Travel by Toilet!.

Keywords: Variety, Obituary

TWO STARS

"Football was in Doug's blood." Be proud of a great leader and a great host in Two Stars.

Keywords: Sport, Knowledge, Football, MLS, Obituary

FRIENDLY FOÉ

"The Indomitable Lions will wear Foé's name proudly on their shirts." Like someone whose silence was telling in Friendly Foé.

Keywords: Sport, Knowledge, Football, Cameroon, Obituary

A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBOURHOOD

Keywords: Variety, Obituary

WATCH FOR DOLPHINS

Keywords: Knowledge, Obituary

ASTRONAUT PETE CONRAD: 1930-1999

Keywords: Space, Knowledge, Obituary

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