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WEEKLY WHINE

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SCHMILBLICK PATROL: ESTER LEDECKÁ

“I do not think you are making the most advantageous use of the limited number of queries that we have.” Maximise enjoyment and efficiency as you standardise your consumption of Schmilblick Patrol: Ester Ledecká.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Winter Olympics

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: JAÏR KARAM

“Hello.” Meet someone who can really make a difference in Schmilblick Patrol: Jaïr Karam.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: SANDRA FRUEAN

“Why not just get a new television?” Upgrade your GoobNet experience in Schmilblick Patrol: Sandra Fruean.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football, Men’s World Cup

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: GIANNI INFANTINO

“Well, good luck with your chemicals, and keep disposing them properly.” Take care of yourself and your follicles in Schmilblick Patrol: Gianni Infantino.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: LUÍS FIGO

“And of course, thank you to our musical guests Green Day, Avril Lavigne, and Elvis Costello for helping show us all just how much of an embarrassment Sepp Blatter really is.” Be disappointed that Adele and Norah Jones were unavailable for Schmilblick Patrol: Luís Figo.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football, FIFA

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: ROGER GOODELL

“Well, I was already going to do all that anyway.” Plan your participation correctly in Schmilblick Patrol: Roger Goodell.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, American football, NFL

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: MICHEL PLATINI

“You thought the stop sign guy was a gorilla?” Discover whether the Ampelmännchen was actually three roosters and a vole in Schmilblick Patrol: Michel Platini.

Keywords: Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Sport, Football

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: GYOENGYI GAAL

“How do we know that you’re not the evil twin?” Understand the beeps in Schmilblick Patrol: Gyoengyi Gaal.

Keywords: Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Sport, Football, Women’s World Cup

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: LISLE AUSTIN

“We Dutch don’t take too kindly to that sort of talk about speed skating.” Be aware of which lane you should occupy in Schmilblick Patrol: Lisle Austin.

Keywords: Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Sport, Football

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: ISSA HAYATOU

“The confederation is not responsible for providing security until the team arrives in the city in which its matches are played.” See how culpable parties rationalise their decisions in Schmilblick Patrol: Issa Hayatou.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: DAVID STERN

“I didn’t know that you guys have your own Des Moines in Washington.” Experience the peculiarities of the US Pacific Northwest’s geography in Schmilblick Patrol: David Stern.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Basketball, NBA

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: TOM O’CONNOR

“I would have to say [bleep].” Don’t be afraid to say things they don’t want you to say in Schmilblick Patrol: Tom O’Connor.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Basketball

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: DON GARBER

“How does one research graffiti?” Encounter some of the world’s most pointless professions in Schmilblick Patrol: Don Garber.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football, MLS

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: MARCEL MATHIER

“That sounds absurdly specific.” Be the first to know about a ligament in a knee in a player on a team in Schmilblick Patrol: Marcel Mathier.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: URS LINSI

“Hey, that’s great! You even spelled Nederland correctly.” Don’t look a gift scarf in the mouth in Schmilblick Patrol: Urs Linsi.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Football, Women’s World Cup

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: DAVID STERN

“David, does your wife like the feel of your balls?” Know some things you really didn’t want to know about professional basketball in Schmilblick Patrol: David Stern.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Basketball, NBA

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