|71||Men’s World Cup|
|21||Women’s World Cup|
MON 03 DEC 2018
“Therefore, theoretically, someone could decide not to wait for FIFA and to instead compute the rankings on their own.” Provide detailed instructions to Gianni Infantino regarding the proper usage of his calculator in The Greatest Draw That Drawing Has Ever Drawn.
MON 26 NOV 2018
“It’s Mardi Gras!” Celebrate spring break responsibly in Evaluation of 30 Kits Representing 29 Cities.
MON 19 NOV 2018
“There have been a hell of a lot of stupid things that non-referees have said about referees.” Stand by for our apology to Mark Geiger in The Football Referees’ Forum and the Case of the Missing Coin.
MON 12 NOV 2018
“Shortly thereafter, Torinese ceased operations.” Realise that football is not really worth all the trouble, and that we should all go home and ask Italian Football Championship: Whatever Happened To....
MON 05 NOV 2018
“Let us now take this opportunity to introduce a Women’s International Timetable and Schedule for Advancing World Football and Unifying Leagues.” Deploy an angry tweet storm regarding our inability to deconflict the Olympic qualifiers and the CONMEBOL Women’s Nations League as we show you How to Clean Up the Women’s International Calendar.
MON 29 OCT 2018
“Is there not a way to give these teams something to do in the interim?” Become fully aware that the next Mia Hamm is out there – and that there exist female footballers other than Mia Hamm – in How to Rise to the Challenge of Women’s Football.
MON 22 OCT 2018
“We expand the women’s Olympic football tournament to sixteen teams.” Discover that Jamaica are not going anywhere without a fight in How to Play More Women’s Football.
MON 15 OCT 2018
“The AFC has an alarmingly low Women’s World Cup participation rate: less than half of its membership entered the 2019 qualifiers.” Remind Saudi Arabia early and often that women are footballers too in How to Qualify for the Women’s World Cup.
MON 17 SEP 2018
“In fact, Barcelona’s first league match had to be delayed so that they could play the winner of the final.” Wait for anyone... anyone... to win in Spanish Primera División: Whatever Happened To....
MON 13 AUG 2018
“Five conferences were selected for our team of prognosticators to prognosticate.” See what prognostications our prognosticators have prognosticated in Fully Confident in Confidence.
MON 16 JUL 2018
“In a tournament that set a record with twelve own goals, one of them in the final, how can we decide who receives the coveted Jeff Agoos ¡Autogolazo! Award?” Take to the streets in outrage that your favoured candidate did not receive the Golden Blindfold in The Wrongest Penalty in the History of Wrongness.
MON 09 JUL 2018
“The fact that this squad have not yet been brought down to Earth in horribly crushing fashion does not mean that it will not happen.” Watch the semifinals from your panic bunker in A Brief Look Ahead.
MON 02 JUL 2018
“What are we doing here?” Eagerly anticipate the spectacle of Luis Suárez answering the great questions of our time, which for all you know occurred on Interaction: Men’s World Cup Video Screens.
MON 25 JUN 2018
“Well, obviously, we here at GoobNet totally know the answer to that.” Experience immense regret at not having taken the blue pill in The Matrices.
MON 18 JUN 2018
“At the Men’s World Cup, each team has two kits.” Take the GoobNet Men’s World Cup Change Kit Challenge in The GoobNet Men’s World Cup Change Kit Challenge.
MON 11 JUN 2018
“Some of the other unforgettable moments include Ethan Horvath’s acrobatic save of a Justin Kluivert header in the United States’ wild 5-4 loss to the Netherlands, the semifinal goal by Italy’s Jorginho that was disallowed after a tense fifty two minute video review, and the infamous press conference in which Robert Mancini denounced the corruption of the organisers of the Bender B Rodriguez Blackjack and Hookers Cup and announced that Italy were going to stage their own tournament, only to later conclude that both the tournament and the blackjack were to be discontinued, and, upon further reflection, so was the entire thing.” Realise that nothing is a complete load, not if you can imagine the Results of the Bender B Rodriguez Blackjack and Hookers Cup.
PLEASE SEND ALL TEXT-BASED SENSUALITY TO <GOOBNET@GOOBNET.NET>
© 2019 GOOBNET ENTERPRISES, INC [WHICH DOESN’T ACTUALLY EXIST HOWEVER]
THIS FILE ACCURATE AS OF: MON 08 APR 2019 – 12:00:00 UTC · GENERATED IN 0.027 SECONDS