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PROUDLY ERRING ON THE SIDE OF WHATEVER’S FUNNIER SINCE 1997

WEEKLY WHINE

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JASMINE’S THE PRICE IS RIGHT STRATEGY GUIDE: CLOCK GAME

“At this point, you can make use of a trick that alarmingly few contestants employ.” Find out just how lucky the Lucky Drew Dollars are in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Clock Game.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Game shows, Strategy

ADDITION OF EDITIONS

“All right! Enough! We don’t care any more! Just wear whatever you want! Leave us alone!” Get too much information in Addition of Editions.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Basketball, NBA, Sport uniforms

THE FAIR WAY TO PLAY FAIR

“It has not actually written this definition; it has merely proposed that such a definition should exist.” Feel relieved that we are not discussing the word pornography in The Fair Way to Play Fair.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football

MEN’S WORLD CUP EXPANSION: WHO?

“This expansion has been approved, though, which means that short of Gianni Infantino being visited by the Ghosts of Men’s World Cups Past, Present, and Yet to Come, the 2026 Men’s World Cup will be a large, ungainly beast of 80 matches in 32 days.” Meet Diego Maradona, Lionel Messi, and Christian Pulisic in Men’s World Cup Expansion: Who?.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Sport, Football, Men’s World Cup

RUSH TO VISIBILITY

“We here at GoobNet thought that for an obvious cash grab, it was actually somewhat well executed.” Reach for the currency of your choice – provided it is not the 1,000 rupee note – in Rush to Visibility.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, American football, NFL, Sport uniforms, Interactive

VOTE FOR THE VOTERS

“Shortly after the pizza arrived, they emerged with a plan.” Quantify the importance of pepperoni in Vote for the Voters.

Keywords: Politics, Propaganda, Support, SPEED, United States, MADCAP

RUSH TO JUDGMENT

“Can you come up with a better combination than the NFL?” Dare to wear two things that are the same colour in Rush to Judgment.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, American football, NFL, Sport uniforms, Interactive

AN APPEAL ON BEHALF OF THE TURKMENISTAN TOURISM BOARD

“What do you mean no?” Disagree with everything Mr Goober says in An Appeal On Behalf of the Turkmenistan Tourism Board.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Tourism, Turkmenistan

WHEREIN THE GOOBNET SPEED WELCOMES JASMINE

“Why do you hate America?” Eagerly anticipate the long awaited return of the logical fallacy in Wherein the GoobNet SPEED Welcomes Jasmine.

Keywords: Support, SPEED

ALL GLORY TO THE SPONSORS

“Wait, how did that last one get in there?” See what Amber Lynn slipped past the editor this time in All Glory to the Sponsors.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Summer Olympics

64 OTHER NAMES

“Please stop, because this is our Weekly Whine.” Present your own Daily Diatribe as a rebuttal to 64 Other Names.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, American football, NFL

A TRIUMPHANT RETURN TO SCOTLAND

“Way to go.” Agree with everything that Mr Goober says in A Triumphant Return to Scotland.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, Scotland, Sport uniforms

HAIL TO THE REFORMERS

“The mere fact that they are called ‘television timeouts’ is a clear admission that there is no competitive reason for them to exist.” Demand the introduction of milk and cookie breaks whilst singing Hail to the Reformers.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, American football

HOW TO RESTORE PRIDE IN FOOTBALL

“Footballers are people, not property.” Follow the lead of President Foudy as you discover How to Restore Pride in Football.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPEED, Football, FIFA

THE SOLUTION TO BASKETBALL

“At last, we have reached the long sought after utopia where the same foul results in the same penalty regardless of when during the game it occurs.” Win causality in The Solution to Basketball.

Keywords: Sport, Propaganda, Support, SPEED, Basketball

THE GOOBNET SPEED EST CHARLIE

“I said, where are you and when did you get there?” Understand your current world line in The GoobNet SPEED est Charlie.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, France

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