|71||Men’s World Cup|
|21||Women’s World Cup|
MON 19 DEC 2016
“We would like to apologise for this, because most of you are exceptional actors who have turned in wonderful performances in a variety of different films and television programmes.” Be completely honest about your shortcomings and give Advance Notification.
MON 12 DEC 2016
“Nerd Balm: Sport It!” See why we totally need Jim Parsons as the pitchman for Cool Jug Ears, Race Me.
MON 05 DEC 2016
“On Wednesday night, when the first leg of the final was to have been played in Medellín, candlelight vigils were instead held in Chapecoense’s stadium and in the home stadium of their final opponents, Atlético Nacional.” Go forward in all your beliefs, including the one that they are Champions Always.
MON 28 NOV 2016
“Shortly after the pizza arrived, they emerged with a plan.” Quantify the importance of pepperoni in Vote for the Voters.
MON 21 NOV 2016
“I have never seen a birth certificate!” Realise that everything is sad, unfair, and sadly unfair, at least until we Make US Soccer Great Again.
MON 14 NOV 2016
“The question naturally arises: What other things did American voters fuck up on Tuesday?” Live in abject fear of a reduction in the minimum wage as you await the Results of 2016 US Ballot Measures.
MON 07 NOV 2016
“Exists in most of the other things on this list.” Express immense relief that for once we are not talking about the proton and the electron in Create the W.
MON 31 OCT 2016
“So what should you do?” Put on some pants and review your Guide to 2016 US Ballot Measures.
MON 24 OCT 2016
“Can you come up with a better combination than the NFL?” Dare to wear two things that are the same colour in Rush to Judgment.
MON 17 OCT 2016
“And we dare you to find any evidence to the contrary.” Conclude that the correct answer is “all of it” in Let Us Look Down the Ballot.
MON 10 OCT 2016
“Today, we look ahead to the second presidential debate. Which candidate will interrupt the other more? Which candidate will avoid more of the public’s questions? We have all the answers that we just made up and that you could have predicted anyway!” Know all along that there was not really any point in tuning in to Samsan Gymnasium.
MON 03 OCT 2016
“And how can we find out without having to submit an expense report that Reg would never, ever approve?” Ensure that you retain your receipts when Seoul Reverses the Mailbox.
MON 26 SEP 2016
“But you should stop that, because we have totally cracked your code.” Rest assured that we know exactly what you mean by “empty the Pixy Stik” in Analogise Responsibly.
MON 19 SEP 2016
“What do you mean no?” Disagree with everything Mr Goober says in An Appeal On Behalf of the Turkmenistan Tourism Board.
MON 12 SEP 2016
“I just wanted to point out that I didn’t know that.” Avoid letting the facts get in the way of a good joke in Food and Taxes.
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