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THE INVERSE OF ZAPP BRANNIGAN

WEEKLY WHINE

... 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019

YET ANOTHER REASON TO WEAR LONG SLEEVES

“Presumably that is due to the city’s desire to stay classy.” Determine what we’re yelling about in Yet Another Reason to Wear Long Sleeves.

Keywords: Variety, Sport

FORTY THIRD DOWN

“This was actually the subject of some very heated discussions here at GoobNet headquarters.” Discover who totally has an irrational hatred directed at the ineligible man downfield signal in Forty Third Down.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, American football, NFL

SEVENTEENTH DOWN

“The game recap hilariously listed the unsportsmanlike conduct as a 20 yard penalty.” Decide how many yards a thoughtless opining penalty would be in Seventeenth Down.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, American football, NFL

GOSH, THAT WANG IS XL

“So I guess you could call this a catastro-Feck-up.” Come to the conclusion that we are making no Fecking sense as you discover that Gosh, That Wang is XL.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Summer Olympics, Review committee

COPPER AND MARSHMALLOWS

“It has been far too long.” Know how long is long enough in Copper and Marshmallows.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Summer Olympics

PLEASE PROCEED DIRECTLY TO SOME OTHER LANE

“Information below is accurate, if at all, as of SUN 29 JUL 2012.” Come face to face with another opportunity to locate the GoobNet Super Factual Error in Please Proceed Directly to Some Other Lane.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Summer Olympics

41 TO WATCH

“If we need to explain to you why the Men’s World Cup is the greatest football tournament there is, this is probably not the website for you.” See what Jim Rome is burning about today in 41 to Watch.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football

2012 GOOBNET MLS HISTORICAL CUP

“Teams were seeded based upon their accomplishments during that season, with the Supporters Shield and MLS Cup counting the most.” Try to avoid overlooking the 1999 MetroStars in 2012 GoobNet MLS Historical Cup.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Tournament, Football, MLS

COUNTING DOWN TO THE RHINOS

“Every match has a story, not just the ones with giant green tifos behind the goals.” See why you should leave your chainsaw at home in Counting Down to the Rhinos.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, MLS

FAR FROM UNLIKELY

“Eight European nations were selected randomly for our team of prognosticators.” See who is going to stop Aberystwyth Town [everyone] in Far from Unlikely.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, UEFA, Prediction

COMMENCE BASKING IMMEDIATELY

“Didn’t think we’d go that way, did you?” Determine your disappointment in our directional decisions in Commence Basking Immediately.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Women’s World Cup, Review committee

YES, YOUR OUTFIT IS CAUSING IT

“The team need only be issued with cigarettes and bérets to complete the stereotype.” Avoid getting sweat on your sweatsuit in Yes, Your Outfit Is Causing It.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Women’s World Cup, Sport uniforms

RISING EXCITEMENT, FALLING CONSCRIPTION

“What better way to celebrate the end of the German draft?” Hope that German lager is not also ending in Rising Excitement, Falling Conscription.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, Women’s World Cup

FOR FAIRNESS, FOR HONESTY

“I can’t actually play it, but if I could, I would know how.” See if we are talking about Battleship or Risk in For Fairness, For Honesty.

Keywords: Variety, Sport, Football, Edvard

NOW ACQUIRING SCHWANK

“We here at GoobNet are pleased to present to you this prediction of the results of the World Group of the 2011 Davis Cup, the 100th edition of the tournament, and of the World Group of the 2011 Fed Cup, the 49th edition.” Welcome a new keyword to the tie in Now Acquiring Schwank.

Keywords: Variety, Sport, Tennis, Prediction

ACE LOGJAM RESOURCE

“Snacking Tips: A Story.” See why we didn’t select “Partying, So Can’t Kiss” in Ace Logjam Resource.

Keywords: Variety, Sport, Football, MLS

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