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YOUR OFFICIAL LUCY DIAMOND NEWS SOURCE

WEEKLY WHINE

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BE IT RESOLVED

"A game show with a host who actually plays! Come on!" See if anyone... anyone... anyone wants to play in Be It Resolved.

Keywords: Variety

TITAN STUMPS EDVARD

"I'm not sure you're addressing these questions about name origins the way the askers wanted." Experience the pride of uncertainty in Titan Stumps Edvard.

Keywords: Space, Community, Edvard, Solar system

THE FOLLY OF ARTEST

"Four years from now, when you're all being laid off, you will see the error of your ways." Encounter the bitter truth in The Folly of Artest.

Keywords: Variety, Review committee

TELEMARKETERS ON BREAK

"Are you dialing the right numbers, if you know what I mean?" Experience the virtues of subtlety in Telemarketers on Break.

Keywords: Variety, Whose Line

VOTE FOR THE FRAUD

"Ha ha! I'm the winner! I'm gonna ban gay civil unions now!" Experience disastrous social reform in Vote for the Fraud.

Keywords: Politics, Community, Mailbox

ARE WE THERE YET

"ROAD CONSTRUCTION NEXT 16 KM: TRAFFIC FINES DOUBLED" Don't drink and blow snow in Are We There Yet.

Keywords: Variety

NO WINNERS

"The Fascist Communications Commission - I mean the Federal Communications Commission - is reportedly reviewing the complaints to decide whether to begin an investigation." Defeat hypocrisy in bureaucracy in No Winners.

Keywords: Sport, Propaganda, Novelty, Football, UEFA, Basketball, NBA, American football

YAY LAZINESS

"We're too lazy to write something good this week." Be unsurprised in Yay Laziness.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Football, MLS, Interactive

INTERACTION: 2004 ELECTION AFTERMATH

"How can this happen? He's from Massachusetts and everything! And he ran against a %&@*ing cowboy! This is madness!" Panic in Interaction: 2004 Election Aftermath.

Keywords: Politics, Novelty, Interaction

JUST WAIT FOR THE NEXT ECLIPSE

"If I was using steroids, would I be standing here right now talking to you in a voice like Jennifer Tilly's?" Disprove the more shocking allegations in Just Wait for the Next Eclipse.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Baseball, Interactive

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: ALEX RODRIGUEZ

"I'm a professional Segway racer." Reach top speeds of 5 m/s on open roads in Schmilblick Patrol: Alex Rodriguez.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Baseball

LIVING TO SUCK ANOTHER DAY

"Meanwhile, Tomáš Rosický scores three goals, all on headers, and Marek Heinz adds two, both on assers." Find convenient way to make use of rarely needed body parts in Living to Suck Another Day.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, UEFA, Men’s World Cup, Prediction

INTERACTION: X PRIZE RECAP

"But then you have to come up with new names for all the extra days, like Catilsday and Anagramday and Uranday, except that you don't want people mispronouncing Uranday because that would be bad." Reallocate nomenclature for diurnal durations in Interaction: X Prize Recap.

Keywords: Space, Novelty, Interaction

ONE DOWN, ONE TO GO

"Kind of ironic, isn't it? 'SpaceShipOne' has no space." Define textual requirements in One Down, One to Go.

Keywords: Space, Community, Mailbox

INTERACTION: CATEGORISING HORIZONTALITY

"For instance, this morning when my wife and I had it, it was to give us something to do before the alarm clock went off." Make mornings fun again in Interaction: Categorising Horizontality.

Keywords: Novelty, Interaction

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: FRANK FRANCISCO

"Yes. At the video arcades and skate parks of Hamilton, today's fashionable youth are decked out in the latest in bowler hats." Encounter new guidelines of style in Schmilblick Patrol: Frank Francisco.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Baseball

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