GoobNet

GoobNet menu

GoobNet

WHAT TARA REID MASTURBATES TO

WEEKLY WHINE

... 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018

MLS KITS EXIST

“Once you have all twelve correct, you will advance to our exciting new bonus round, Beat Don Garber.” Determine whether that totally was or totally was not endangering the safety of the opponent in MLS Kits Exist.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Football, MLS, Interactive

OCEANS THAT MAKE A DIFFERENCE

“All known lifeforms require a nonzero amount of water, and the vast majority of Earth’s biodiversity is aquatic.” Live in hydrodynamic equilibrium with our planet in Oceans That Make a Difference.

Keywords: Variety, Oceanography

JASMINE’S THE PRICE IS RIGHT STRATEGY GUIDE: UNWRITTEN RULES

“If you’re not sure, just guess US$3,000.” Say the secret word, which is totally not banana, in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Unwritten Rules.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Game shows, Strategy

STUMP EDVARD AND WIN A TRIP TO MARS

“And it will all happen once I obtain sufficient funding to turn my Winnebago into a spaceship in accordance with the instructions I received in a dream!” Listen to the latest herenow noizebop from Razor and the Scummettes in Stump Edvard and Win a Trip to Mars.

Keywords: Space, Community, Edvard, Stump Edvard, Solar system, Mars

ON THE ORIGIN OF BRACKETS

“Oh, those sirens. Merely a precaution.” Pay no attention to those conspiracy hypotheses on Reddit in On the Origin of Brackets.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Mailbox, Basketball

2018 GOOBNET WOMEN’S WINTER PARALYMPIC CHAMPIONSHIP: RESULTS

“The tournament, as with the Paralympic Games themselves, was full of surprises.” Realise that your attention has not been directed to the right place, and overcompensate for this by directing your attention to the 2018 GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship: Results.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Tournament, Winter Paralympics

2018 GOOBNET WOMEN’S WINTER PARALYMPIC CHAMPIONSHIP: BRACKETS

“Fill in your bracket by clicking your preferred Paralympian in each pair.” Fill in your bracket by clicking your preferred Paralympian in each pair whilst avoiding the Whammy in 2018 GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship: Brackets.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Tournament, Interactive, Winter Paralympics

2018 GOOBNET WOMEN’S WINTER PARALYMPIC CHAMPIONSHIP: SEEDINGS

“We are pleased to announce the seeds for the first GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship, determining the best female Paralympian of all time.” View the seeds for the first GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship in 2018 GoobNet Women’s Winter Paralympic Championship: Seedings.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Tournament, Winter Paralympics

JASMINE’S THE PRICE IS RIGHT STRATEGY GUIDE: TEN CHANCES

“So let’s prepare ourselves for it.” Wisely sidestep all numerical challenges in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Ten Chances.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Game shows, Strategy

DISTRACTION

“We hope these will help you through the next 3.96 years of being forgotten about again.” Do your best to retain the knowledge that curling is in fact a sport that exists, even in the face of constant Distraction.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Winter Olympics, Review committee

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: ESTER LEDECKÁ

“I do not think you are making the most advantageous use of the limited number of queries that we have.” Maximise enjoyment and efficiency as you standardise your consumption of Schmilblick Patrol: Ester Ledecká.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Winter Olympics

THE EXISTENCE OF THE WINTER OLYMPICS

“Why do snowboards exist?” Realise that the answer is “because humans make them” in The Existence of the Winter Olympics.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Mailbox, Ontology, Winter Olympics

THE SUPER BOWL SWINGOMETER

“Well, that was an interesting Super Bowl.” Discover that we really do write these things months in advance and have no idea what actually happened yesterday in The Super Bowl Swingometer.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, American football, NFL

JASMINE’S THE PRICE IS RIGHT STRATEGY GUIDE: COVER UP

“How, then, do you maximise the number of guesses?” Just keep saying numbers in Jasmine’s The Price Is Right Strategy Guide: Cover Up.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Game shows, Strategy

THE FUTURE, AND WHY YOU SHOULD FEAR IT

“You can hide in your fear bunker and only read news that coincides with your preprogrammed worldview, but that has repeatedly been proven to make the future arrive suddenly without notice when you least expect it.” Watch the fakest fake news that ever faked the news in The Future, and Why You Should Fear It.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT

ICE AND FIRE, BUT NO SINGING

“There was no official logo, but there was a poster depicting a giant eagle attacking some bobsledders, or something.” Watch out for snakes in Ice and Fire, but No Singing.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Winter Olympics

PLEASE SEND ALL STEAMY E-MAILS TO <GOOBNET‍@‍GOOBNET.NET>

© 2018 GOOBNET ENTERPRISES, INC [WHICH DOESN’T ACTUALLY EXIST HOWEVER]

THIS FILE ACCURATE AS OF: MON 10 DEC 2018 – 12:00:00 UTC · GENERATED IN 0.015 SECONDS