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CAUTION: CONTENTS MAY BE REACTIONARY OR ILL INFORMED

WEEKLY WHINE

... 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019

WELCOME BACK TO THE HIVE

“But for the Hornets, teal always seemed the appropriate choice.” Be pleased that they didn’t select electric mucus in Welcome Back to the Hive.

Keywords: Sport, Knowledge, Basketball, NBA

THE DEFINITIVE BASEBALL MASCOT EVALUATION

“He no longer performs that stunt, probably because it would void the warranty of Safeco Field.” Don’t waste your money on the protection plan in The Definitive Baseball Mascot Evaluation.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Baseball, MLB

THE GOOBNET SPEED EXPLORES HEALTH INSURANCE ON WEST EGG

“Because they’re run by rich fuckers who can’t fucking relate to the rest of us.” Determine why either Sacramento or Seattle is going to be very sad in a few weeks in The GoobNet SPEED Explores Health Insurance on West Egg.

Keywords: Support, SPEED, Literature

NO LONGER TIME TO GO WOOT ABOUT LIQUID HELIUM

“Go visit a site that you do have the right to visit.” Discover why nobody cares how many Harlem Shake videos you watch in No Longer Time to Go Woot About Liquid Helium.

Keywords: Support, SPLUT

MLS: ARRRGH! REVISITED

“However, MLS did not follow our advice.” Suppress your disappointment in the lack of an Edvard Rule in MLS: ARRRGH! Revisited.

Keywords: Sport, Propaganda, Support, ARRRGH, Football, MLS

UNDERSTAND HUMANITY WITH EDVARD

“If you are less than about thirty years old, you will never be able to understand the 1980s.” Realise that Beverly Hills Cop will tell you pretty much everything you need to know in Understand Humanity with Edvard.

Keywords: Community, Edvard, Stump Edvard

THE GOOBNET SOLAR SYSTEM MOON QUIZ

“So, in honour of the Universe, we thought we would give you this opportunity to measure your knowledge of it.” Ask not what your Universe can do for you in The GoobNet Solar System Moon Quiz.

Keywords: Space, Community, Solar system, Interactive

A VARIETY OF LOCATIONS ON MARS

“There is even olivine to be found in parts of Syrtis Major, as well as a variety of interesting dikes.” Make sure Amber Lynn is paying attention in A Variety of Locations on Mars.

Keywords: Space, Variety, Mars

NOMINATING SESSION FOR SCIENCE POPE

“Another panellist, though, snarkily remarked, ‘When was it cool before?’” Discover that we are not in fact talking about rice sorting in Nominating Session for Science Pope.

Keywords: Propaganda, Novelty, Science, Scientist Laureate

BRACKET BEFUDDLEMENT

“Is the round of 64 really the ‘second round’?” Count the seeds in Bracket Befuddlement.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Mailbox, Basketball

2013 GOOBNET GLOBAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE CUP

“Fifty leagues around the world have had at least one continental champion, of which the Argentine, Brazilian, Italian, Spanish, Uruguayan, German, Dutch, English, Portuguese, Paraguayan, and Serbian leagues have had at least one world champion.” Discover why PRK Hekari United totally got robbed in 2013 GoobNet Global Football League Cup.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Tournament, Football

PROBABLE PAPABILI

“Or will we finally see the most awesome name possible: Pope Lando II?” Determine whether Cardinal Billy Dee Williams is available in Probable Papabili.

Keywords: Community, Mailbox, Religion

SEQUESTERIFFIC

“Why are we liquidating our orderlies?” See what you can save, when you can save it, in Sequesteriffic.

Keywords: Politics, Support, United States

FIND OUT IF NOBODY BEATS ‘WIZ’

“So don’t be like Rafa Márquez.” Find someone else to headbutt in Find Out If Nobody Beats ‘Wiz’.

Keywords: Sport, Support, SPLUT, Football, MLS

RESPECT AND SUPPORT

“So what about the rice pudding?” Find out what was strange about Pia Sundhage’s guitar in Respect and Support.

Keywords: Variety, Sport, Propaganda, Football

HISTORIC BROADCASTS

“Please try to do better at future Super Bowls.” Get Colin Kaepernick the help he needs in Historic Broadcasts.

Keywords: Community, Mailbox, Advertising

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