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NO TWELVE HOUR TIME PERMITTED BEYOND THIS POINT

WEEKLY WHINE

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INTERACTION: EXPLAINING THE INFLATION FETISH

"You can't really see the Universe expanding. Not with the naked eye." Don't trust your eyes, which can deceive you, in Interaction: Explaining the Inflation Fetish.

Keywords: Space, Novelty, Interaction

TWO STARS

"Football was in Doug's blood." Be proud of a great leader and a great host in Two Stars.

Keywords: Sport, Knowledge, Football, MLS, Obituary

MRO YEAH

"This is what we call a stalemated punchline." Develop the boundaries of theoretical humour in MRO Yeah.

Keywords: Space, Community, Mailbox, Solar system

QUARTERLY REVIEW

"But it's not enough just to provide things that make you smart, give you support, offer new experiences, bring you together, and differentiate themselves." Take stock of yourself in Quarterly Review.

Keywords: Knowledge, Administrivia

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: LINDSEY JACOBELLIS

"Lindsey, were you thinking Does my board still feel the same?" Get a feel for hard things in Schmilblick Patrol: Lindsey Jacobellis.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Winter Olympics

THE DE-HUH?-IFICATION OF THE WORLD

"That's right, Terrell. Today we're going to show you some methods that you can use to ensure that you'll be swearing, bitching, and whining for years to come." Discover the secret to safe writing in The de-Huh?-ification of the World.

Keywords: Novelty

TIPS FOR THE GEEKY

"This would make procreation impossible, except in the case of hermaphrodites." Be a little bit more than you really need to be in Tips for the Geeky.

Keywords: Community, Mailbox

I CALL IT THE HMS MODESTY

"Carew will contemplate this information, and then say, 'Ooba-ooba nai-nai-nai wolka-wolka gam-gam-gam-gam ooba-ooba nai-nai-nai wolka...'." Don't be the one to miss Silly Noise Saturday in I Call It the HMS Modesty.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, Football, UEFA, Prediction

THE BIRDMAN OF BASKETBALLCATRAZ

"The youth of Oklahoma City need to have honest role models like Stephen Colbert, and yet we get some dunking, jumping, dope pushing dope like Andersen." Be a hero in The Birdman of Basketballcatraz.

Keywords: Sport, Community, Mailbox, Basketball, NBA

SCHMILBLICK PATROL: KENDRA DAVIS

"He ain't never gonna threaten nobody." Don't let your guard down in Schmilblick Patrol: Kendra Davis.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Schmilblick Patrol, Basketball, NBA

MORATORIUM

"If you're going to swear, just %&@*ing do it." Be a pain in the ass in Moratorium.

Keywords: Support, STING

BECAUSE OLD HORIZONS JUST SUCK

"Yeah, I live in the base on Cruella Peak. But I'm thinking of building a habitat on Pongo Planitia." See everything in black and white in Because Old Horizons Just Suck.

Keywords: Space, Variety, Solar system

SANTANA MUWOSS WILL LOVE IT

"And coincidentally enough, you can see an ESPN original movie, Cheergate: Behind the Stall Door, starring Michelle Trachtenberg and Michelle Thorne, this Saturday night at nine Eastern, six Pacific, right here on ESPN and ESPN HD." Fire up the Unintentional Comedy scale in Santana Muwoss Will Love It.

Keywords: Sport, Variety, American football, Prediction

IT'S ADVANCED PROBABILISTIC ANALYSIS WITH TARA REID!

"And if any of you media outlets %&@* this up again, we will personally deliver a lottery machine to your office so that you can conduct the experiment yourselves." Get the right answer for a change in It's Advanced Probabilistic Analysis with Tara Reid!.

Keywords: Variety, Review committee

YOU CAN'T FOOL EDVARD

"I mean, you wouldn't want to spend a full day training here at the Russian cosmonaut base only to have to see some incomprehensible brand name on a urinal cake, would you?" Let familiarity breed illogic in You Can't Fool Edvard.

Keywords: Community, Edvard

INTERACTION: MEN'S WORLD CUP DRAW

"It's not what you did, it's what you're going to do." Conduct a preemptive strike in Interaction: Men's World Cup Draw.

Keywords: Sport, Novelty, Interaction, Football, Men’s World Cup

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